That's October 19th

Thanks to petty reasoning, disappointment came over me the weekend before last. And soon this disappointment turned into anticipation. I don't know how long I can wait, but perhaps this is only another test of patience in the most superficial form out there. One good lesson has emerged from this: October 19th is not just a date, it is a state of mind.

When autumn finally feels like autumn outside -- that's October 19th.

When someone says exactly what you need to hear at a given time -- that's October 19th.

When you break open a new jar of nutella -- that's October 19th.

When you go to Disneyland one hour before it closes just because you can -- that's October 19th.

Turning a four hour car drive into a one-woman karaoke room -- that's October 19th.

When you surprise a good friend on her birthday -- that's October 19th.

When prayers are answered -- that's October 19th.

When Christmas decorations arrive at the stores --that's October 19th.

When a four-year old you haven't seen in a few weeks voluntarily runs over to give you a hug -- that's October 19th.

When your favorite book series comes out with a new book -- that's October 19th.

Finding five and a half hours in one day to start indulging in musical expression -- that's October 19th.

When the Blue Man Group teaches you more about your eyes than you ever learned in any science class you took in school -- that's October 19th.

When opportunities arise to help others -- that's October 19th.

When you put together a fun Halloween costume on a very low budget and feel more than satisfied with the outcome -- that's October 19th.

Eating a four-course meal with great company without spending a cent -- that's October 19th.

When you lead a party with 22 babies/toddlers/kids and 40+ adults without getting a drop of paint on your fancy vest you borrowed -- that's October 19th.

When your co-workers save your butt with bubbles -- that's October 19th.

When you memorize a beautiful wedding song sooner than expected -- that's October 19th.

When gas prices drop below $4.00 -- that's October 19th.

Knowing that although it was supposed to air on October 19th, Community will be back for its fourth season someday -- that's October 19th.

Happy October 19th!!

Digging Holes

Somehow, whenever I try and be real in blog form, I end up distracted, distorted, dizzy, and direction-less (that's not a word, which just proves my point). This may be another one of those times.

A few days ago, I was thinking about the parable of the talents from the New Testament. I have grown up reading this story backwards and forward, seeing it from multiple Christian denominations' points of view. It wasn't until a few days ago, though, that it really hit me. I thought about the servant who received one talent and because he was afraid (or whatever that may translate to) he buried his talent under the ground. And then I thought about myself as that servant, metaphorically burying my talent under the ground, for lots of different reasons: I'm insecure, I'm hesitant to speak up and let others know what I can do, I'm not as talented as the next person, I have no way of contributing my talent or at least no way of knowing how to, I feel like my talent is useless. I found a spot in the ground, a VERY deep spot in the ground, to bury my talent, because I was (and perhaps, am still) afraid.

I don't want to be the servant who buried his talent, and now I'm working to try and dig it back out. I'm stuck in a rut though because I don't know where it is, what I can do, what I'm good at, what I can become good at. (I credit psychology courses for helping me realize what makes me this way, and that's all I'm going to say about that.) I don't know what my talents are, and for the last few months I have been digging around trying to find the exact spot where I buried these talents, but to no avail, and all I'm left with are a bunch empty dug-up holes. If I can find out where my talents are hidden, maybe I can finally figure out how to use them.

This talk of digging and holes just sorted a conglomerate of related songs and clips through the ipod of my mind (and makes me realize I might have a bit more of Abed in me):

1. The Dig It song from Holes, and the movie Holes in general:

2. The Sea of Holes from the movie Yellow Submarine:

3. Celebrity Skin by Hole:

4. Black Hole Sun by Soundgarden:

5. This game of Scene to Rap from Whose Line:

6. Another amusing moment from Community:

Somehow it all comes back to Community, doesn't it? I think I just need to stop being serious in writing here specifically where I know other parties could be reading. (Yes, I'm referring to all two of you who actually read my blog!) All right, back to some more metaphorical digging in search of talent(s). Wish me luck, I need it. Dig it, oh oh oh...

No Pins For Me

I did it. I now have a Pinterest account. And I'm not sure what to do with it yet. My inspiration is gone. I wonder if there's a Pinterest board out there with ideas for Pinterest....

In other girly news, I'm actually watching Project Runway. Sort of. It's mostly background noise while I try to channel my inner girl, but I'm trying. Considering my extreme lack of TV watching as of late, I think this is the longest I may have ever been on the Lifetime channel. And I don't know how much more of this overdramatized fashion drama I can stand to listen to. Yikes, where is MXC, Whose Line, or an SVU marathon when I need it?

I'm also craving a Battle Royale with cheese, AKA a plain grilled cheese from In-N-Out. Perhaps with an extra slice of cheese. The story behind the name? Yup. Board idea? Maybe not.



Enjoy Eating Fiber and Watching The Mentalist

I'm only going to mention briefly that which is reflected in the title of my post. I have thought a lot recently about my maturity (or possibly lack of), and I need to grow up and start acting my age. Whatever that means. I don't really feel like a 20-something and I think I have a lot of growing up to do in certain aspects of my life. On the one hand, I like where I'm at and don't mind staying here, but at the same time, I'm going through a lot of self-actualization, which is eye opening, fascinating, and frustrating at the same time. Many other people my age have well-paying jobs, nice cars, are getting married or having babies (in many instances both), taking lavish vacations, settling into their living situations, and overall basically living a pretty good life. I have a good life too, in fact a great life, but I've wondered if I'm falling behind, if there is something more I am supposed to do with this life. The consolation is I suppose I'm not the only 20-something who feels this way. Until I can figure this all out, I'm going to take my time growing up.

In less thought-jumbling news, I also need to get in touch with my double X chromosome. I should start a pinterest account. Honestly, do guys use pinterest? I think not. As much as I love being an honorary bro to my fellow bros, it's nice to feel like I can indulge in something more girly when things like chick flicks, off-the-shoulder shirts, diet coke, reality TV, and accompanied trips to the restroom have absolutely NO appeal whatsoever.

And in random adorable news, I want to see a live puppy parade. And I want Dean Pelton to be the commentator. Hehe, puppies.

Disneylingual

A new fascination has emerged in the last few weeks: Disney songs in other languages.

This all started when I heard Jackie Chan's Cantonese and Mandarin versions of I'll Make a Man Out Of You. Then I went searching for 1. other Disney songs in Mandarin (mostly from Mulan, but a few others as well) to brush up on the language, 2. other songs sung in the native language of their country of origin, and 3. songs in other more lyrical sounding languages or those languages with certain sounds that would be fitting of certain tunes.

It's a given that the songs from Mulan would sound good in Chinese, so I thought to take a listen to other dubbed Disney songs in Chinese. Not too much success so far, but I can say I have fallen in love with I See the Light in Mandarin. I already love the song as is, but in Mandarin both singers sound amazing and the song actually translates fairly close and very nicely compared to the original English version. A friend of mine mentioned that I See the Light from Tangled has been one of the most popular songs played at weddings as a first dance recently. I won't cave into the cliche of having "our song" be the same as everyone else's song, but she did add if I chose that song as my first dance, I could always choose the Mandarin version instead. Eh, maybe if I marry a Chinese guy, who knows.

So naturally, if the songs of Mulan sound great in Chinese, how about the other Disney movies? So I searched a little bit more, and had the pleasure of listening to songs from Beauty and the Beast and Hunchback of Notre Dame in French, Aladdin in Arabic, Pinocchio in Italian, Jungle Book in Hindi, Lion King in Zulu, Hercules in Greek and Italian (I had to be creative with this one since Latin is kind of a dead language). One of my favorites which I will class in this category for the time being is Friends on the Other Side in French. It is Louisiana, and Dr. Facilier is kind of a hot villain already, so his hot points triple singing in French. Another one, this time one that also hit a tender spot in my heart, is Heaven's Light from The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

Since I was already on a roll, I thought I would search for Disney songs in other languages, not necessarily just those belonging to their respective geographic regions. For instance, there are no Disney songs that take their origins in Japanese per se, but I do enjoy the sound of Japanese in song and it is probably one of the more lyrical Asian dialects to listen to. Also, thanks to Abed from Community, I have been intrigued with the Polish language (that may be the next one to tackle after Chinese and Korean). I also find Portuguese a beautiful language, and aside from Saludos Amigos and The Three Caballeros, it does not get too much exposure otherwise. There are also the languages I never thought to hear, like Icelandic, Flemish, Hebrew, among others. It's fascinating to hear the differences in languages and dialects and how they interpret the songs, and even more fascinating to view the cultural differences just in the translation of their lyrics back into English. A few awesome discoveries have resulted: Hellfire from The Hunckback of Notre Dame in German, Be Prepared from The Lion King in Korean, and Poor Unfortunate Souls from The Little Mermaid in Russian AND Japanese. These all coincidentally happen to be villain songs, but on the lighter side, I have found that many languages can rock I Won't Say I'm In Love:

And the highlight of tonight? The original band is back! I did not think I would be as exciting as I am about this; I cannot stop smiling and jumping in my seat.

Dates are for Daters

About a month ago, a friend of mine made a list on her blog of ten potential dates she would love to go on. Since the dating scene here is close to dead but it's still nice to dream, I thought I would take her up on her challenge and create a list of my own. So here are ten dates I would enjoy going on if the circumstances call for it and the guy is almost as crazy as I am to participate in any of them with me, in no particular order:

Blanket/Pillow Fort
Building a blanket fort together, or if we want to try something way more difficult but way better, a pillow fort. And then chilling in our fort and watching the respective episode Pillows and Blankets, or anything else we feel like watching on a laptop or some other device. We could also create a shadow puppet show with a bedsheet and flashlights inside the fort. Dress code: pajamas.

Two-Person Show
I used to do this as a child and my dad immortalized my best friend and I acting out the first scene of an episode of On Our Own once on his video camera. It might look lame after we see ourselves on film, but it would still be fun to act out a scene or scenes from a TV show, movie, musical, play, whatnot. And the more characters involved, the better, since the two of us will be acting as ALL of them. Throw in a few extra costume pieces like hats, wigs, and glasses to vary things up and distinguish each character from one another.

Duets
Karaoke is fun, and karaoke rooms are great for avoiding the bars, the obnoxious drunks, and the long wait time to sing one song. Providing the guy enjoys it too and could tolerate my odd singing voice, it could be good times for the both of us. Plus we could sing as many songs as we want and also introduce songs to each other that we may never have heard before. And it's always awesome to discover new songs too.

Drinking Buddies
I have enjoyed playing drinking games using non-alcoholic drinks, so why not soberly play a drinking game to a movie or an episode or two of a show? If we would rather not get sick to our stomachs by mixing some nasty alcohol-free drinks together (I recall a game of Kings' Cup in which I drank a mix of what I think was soda, juice, milk, and bottled tea from an Asian market, not a pretty combo), taking drinks could be substituted with ice breakers. Example: with the movie Zoolander, every time the phrase "Hansel, so hot right now" is spoken, one or both of us names off a celebrity we find attractive. Yeah, that's the best example I could think of right now.

Like a Kid Again
An evening at a playground, kids' meals for dinner, swings, slides, bridges to climb over, running around in circles until you collapse. Or if the weather is not cooperative, staying indoors with cartoons or a board game or fingerpainting, or maybe all of the above? Yes, I work with kids for a living.

Sunrise Hike
Self explanatory. It'd be a great way to start the morning, and it would be fun to see the sunrise again and in a more conscious state.

Arcade for Adults
Before I messed things up with the cute guy from New Year's, I had a good time using fake guns to kill zombies with him. And I would love to do that again, but definitely adding a few more games to the mix. Dave & Busters would be awesome, or any other arcade targeted for those grown-ups who, like myself, are still kids at heart.

Christmas in June
This is an amalgam of a birthday party my friend had a few years back and a ritual my aunt used to go through with her kids on a hot summer day. What better way to cool down than relaxing indoors with a cup of cocoa and a few Christmas stories and specials? To embellish on this, maybe setting up a small tree to decorate with tinsel, stringing up some festive holiday lights on the walls, baking gingerbread, and any other simple traditions that usually only take place during the Christmas season.

Stealth
I cannot disclose the details of this date, but if you find your car covered in oreos, or your house heart attacked, or your kitchen covered in streamers.... it wasn't us.

Just Engaged/Just Married
Kudos to my friends who celebrated their semi-recent engagement at Disneyland for spawning this idea! A date where the two of us pretend we have just gotten engaged and go somewhere (likely somewhere where we have never been before so no one recognizes us) and reap the rewards of our fake engagement, whether at Disneyland or elsewhere. Or if we opt to play the "Just Married" game, going somewhere nice and pretending we are on our honeymoon celebrating our recent marriage. Alternate identities could play in quite well here too.

I have a little over 850 days to go on one date. I'll give it the rest of my life for any one of these ten ideas to actually happen if ever. For the handful of people who read my blog: feel free to make your own list if you'd like! Or don't; I'm okay with that too. Either way, Happy Memorial Day weekend!

Cool Cool Cool

First, I am on the edge of my seat after the most recent episode of Once Upon a Time! This hasn't happened in a while. Not sure how I'll be able to wait six more days for the next episode.

Second, I'm still trying to figure out my way around this new Blogger layout.

Third, I came to another realization recently. And it's interesting. I'll elaborate in a moment.

Fourth, I had the incredible honor of attending a fireside featuring Sister Janice Kapp Perry. I almost did not go for a handful of dumb, insignificant reasons, but I'm so glad I went, and I may have had regrets if I missed it. Hands down one of the best firesides I have been to. This also came as another spiritual slap-in-the-face. And that's all I'm going to say about that for now. But it was a joyous evening. And I should probably learn some primary songs.

Okay, back to the third. I was feeling a little down last week, so I shut myself off from most forms of contact to anyone (there are maybe two people I can name off that know a number of the details, so I suppose I contradicted myself just now) and started watching Disney movies, namely Alice in Wonderland, Sleeping Beauty, the Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh, The Black Cauldron, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, and Chicken Little. This was partly to check off films from my 101 list, but also because it was a great distraction. By delving into movies, I was able to shut myself from the outside world. It was almost as if life could just keep going on, without me actively involved in it, and that was okay and no one was the wiser. I could just make believe everything wasn't real, and then come back and discover that I have about two seasons worth of episodes to catch up on in everyone else's lives.

In the meantime, I watched the series of my life and find that it is probably the least viewed and lowest rated show on television. Mostly, I became fearful, this a result of various circumstances directly affecting those I care about, and not affecting them in bad ways either. I guess in the midst of their doings, I started to look into my life and wondered about myself, if I'm even going to have a place anywhere, in anyone's life, if I'm going to do anything worthwhile. And then I tried to ignore these feelings because all they did was bring me down, and that's no fun. So, I would go to work, sing some songs, make funny faces at cute babies, and come home and ponder about my day, if that was all real or if I was just making a cameo appearance in someone else's life (which is also very likely). Watching movies helped, especially Disney, and yet....

So I prayed. A lot. I prayed to understand the extent of why I was feeling so down, and especially for the strength to get through and past it all. No matter how much I avoid talking with others about my insignificant problems, it's nice to have someone to go to who is not on a time frame and always willing to listen.

And then Thursday came along, and with it the blessing of a new episode of Community. While watching, I was vastly intrigued (moreso than my two friends watching beside me, to be sure). I watched this same episode the next day after work, and I knew this episode was exactly what I needed to open my eyes to what I was feeling. And I felt so much better about myself afterwards. And I am better now. Great episode.

In a few days, I will probably look back on this entry and LOL out loud. It's kind of refreshing for me to learn something new about myself every now and then though. Now, "...I'm back to being a weirdo, back to watching from the outside... for now."

And going back to the second, this new Blogger layout will really take some getting used to.